Transparent Christian Magazine

I have previously shared about the tragedy that has come to us in the last two weeks. As I approached the widow of my friend who committed suicide, I felt speechless. What could I say?

Why am I always so compelled to say something in these situations?

Another friend lost her dad at a young age due to a heart attack. Her pastor came over immediately and said, “I have no words to say. I’ve come to cry with you!”

One of the classic cases of grief ministry is the three friends of Job. Upon hearing of his catastrophic losses, they came and sat with him for seven days and never said a word! The trouble began when they started pontificating to Job about the reasons for his losses! Their “presence and silence” would have brought so much more comfort.

In his introduction to the Book of Job, Eugene Peterson says, “Sufferers attract fixers the way road kill attract vultures. Our instincts are aimed at preventing and alleviating suffering, which is a good impulse. However, our words will more than likely not fix things, get rid of them, or make them ‘better’.”

Peterson goes on to say, “We don’t really understand the full nature of our friends’ problems. Second, our friends may not want our advice. Third, the ironic fact of the matter is that more often than not, people do not suffer less when they are committed to following God but more! He concludes with:

“So instead of continuing to focus on preventing suffering—which we simply won’t be very successful at anyway—perhaps we should begin ‘entering’ the suffering, participating insofar as we are able—entering the mystery and looking around for God.”

Mike

C.H.A.M.P.I.O.N.S stands for:

Christ has eliminated my guilt
His Spirit tells me I am his child
Awesome victory is mine
My mind is set on his Spirit
Power is made perfect in weakness
I have the intercession of the Holy Spirit and Jesus
Only God knows why bad things happen to good people
Nothing separates me from his love
Satan has been defeated!

Mike Cowart Sr. is an author and a teacher, a mentor and a friend. You can read more of his excellent C.H.A.M.P.I.O.N.S series here. Contact Mike here.